When the Waves Get Rough, Dad You Got This!

Are you in Survival Mode?

Whether you’re a parent, an expecting parent, or desire to be a parent, we all have ideas about the kind of parent we want to be and how we’re going to raise our kids. You know—the “if that were my kid…” kind of thoughts or discussions. But if you are a parent, you’ve likely discovered the irony in those early assumptions.

Despite our best intentions, we often find ourselves in survival mode, abandoning our carefully made parenting plans just to get through the day.

But this is not the way God calls us to raise our children.

If you’ll indulge me, let me give you some context. In the Bible, God calls for intentional, faith-centered parenting so that life may go well for our children and their children after them.

(Deut. 5:29) 

“And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.”

Deuteronomy 6:6-7

Dads…

Parenthood is not a time to be passive.

I know you often don’t intend to be disengaged. As a wife, I sometimes forget that you wrestle with more internally than I give you credit for. Moms fall into passivity too—and we often need your gentle, steady nudge to pull us out. We’re hoping for and looking to you to lead. Because if we don’t raise our children, the world will—and that is certainly not what God designed. (John 15: 18-19)

Dads I’d like you to hear one of the most impactful things someone shared with me, “If parenthood is hard, you’re doing it right.”

I cling to this when I’m exhausted at the end of the day. I remind myself that I’ve done my job well and reflect on the day—not just the good parts but especially the hard parts. Sometimes I wish I had avoided the challenges, but the truth is, our children learn so much from how we handle those difficult moments. When things get rough, we wives often run to you—because deep down, we know you can persevere through storms in a way that leads others through. You were built for such roughness.

It’s an inevitable part of life that our children are going to face challenges and who better than you to show them how to face those challenges?  

So much of parenthood is about leading by example.

We have both the opportunity and responsibility to model for our children how men should behave—and how they should treat others. The world is loud with its own messages, so we must make sure they hear ours first.

I remind my husband: if he wants our daughters to choose a man someday who treats them well, he must show them what that looks like by how he treats me. The way we treat our spouse is one of the most impactful ways we influence our children’s future relationships.

God has chosen you to be your child’s parent.

That means He knows you have everything it takes to raise them and that He has full confidence in you. Be steadfast in that confidence—not your own, but the confidence that comes from knowing God is with you. You may not be able to lead your family in your own strength, and that’s okay. God doesn’t ask you to rely solely on yourself. He calls you into relationship with Him—a relationship where His strength becomes yours.

---

3 Things You Need to Know When the Waves Get Rough

You are a Captain

You are the most powerful man in the world, in their eyes. Being Dad has the biggest impact on your kids life, whether for good or bad.

Don’t Avoid the Storm, Be Anchored in it

Storms are an opportunity to lead your family. They will likely face these soon enough on their own. Show them how to serve others in adversity.

Your Voice is a Beacon

You may not have all the right answers but they need to hear your heart. A Father’s Voice cuts through the noise of the world.

2 Things You Should Do

Find your Fleet

Don’t weather fatherhood alone. Surround yourself with men who build up other men.

Be Vulnerable

Don’t mask your feelings, show how you lead through them. Model healthy emotional navigation.

1 Who You Can Always Count On!

God, our Father in Heaven, is our primary example of being a Father, who we can always turn to through Jesus Christ.

---

The LORD is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?

Psalm 27:1